In my role as an executive coach and mindfulness teacher, I’m often asked: ‘How does mindfulness work and why’s it so important?’
It’s a question I typically answer by highlighting research based evidence on how mindfulness positively changes the brain and impacts neurophysiology, as well as how it can lead to changes in awareness and behaviour that enhance leadership effectiveness and impact.
After last week’s US presidential election, however, the answer became much more personal.
My Challenge
As both an American and an Australian I found myself continually bombarded with requests to either explain what had happened in the country of my birth, or invitations to join in the chorus of shock, disappointment, and bewilderment being expressed—privately and on social media—by so many of my Australian friends, colleagues, and family members.
And if I’m honest, part of me really did want to let rip. Deeply shocked and dismayed by President Elect Trump’s success, I experienced alternating waves of disillusionment, anxiousness, embarrassment, frustration, and sadness (loss). My thoughts urged me to act. Now!
What I Chose
But somehow, amidst all the external and internal noise, I chose to pause and reflect. I chose to reside, for a time, in the space between what was happening all around and within me, and any overt action I might decide to take.
Upon reflection, I chose to be mindful, to practice mindfulness.
For me it was a wise option.
I avoided getting caught up in the turbulence by allowing myself to just be with what I was experiencing. Time and time again I connected with my breath and the constantly changing sensations in my body. I intentionally paid attention to the shifting tide of emotions, coming and going. And I consciously observed the endless stream of thoughts masquerading as facts.
Each time a particularly powerful emotion tried to hijack my focus or an incessant thought tried to limit my perspective, I did my best to let go of judgement. I did my best to simply accept what was—right there, right then, in that moment.
Moment by moment, with each breath, the seemingly urgent need to react subsided. My body began to soften. The dark cloud of apparent doom began to dissipate, and I was able to hold both my thoughts and emotions more lightly.
It was a cycle of choosing to be mindful that repeated for days after the election.
Of course, being mindful didn’t change what had happened. It didn’t put an end to the thoughts and emotions. Nor did it make the unpleasant pleasant. But it did allow me to reside, as uncomfortable as it was at times, in that liminal space between stimulus and resolution.
Where I Landed
A residing and allowing that ultimately enabled me to land in a place that felt more spacious, less hurried, and less threatening. A gentler and more inclusive place that was grounded in the present (as opposed to being stuck in the past or preoccupied with catastrophising about the future).
A place that enabled me to realise, once again, that my personal perspective was truly just that—a perspective, one of many possible views and certainly not a fact.
Critically too, a place that allowed me to see that if I spontaneously reacted and lashed out—against what I perceived to be Trump’s egotistical, prejudiced, isolationist, shallow, impulsive, and offensive thinking and behaviour—I’d be mirroring much of what I was railing against. And in the process, I’d also be denying a piece of myself (my very humanity), as I too have the potential to be all those things, in some form, however well-hidden in my shadow they might be.
Mindfulness lead me to that place.
What I Discerned
And mindfulness eventually helped me to discern that the wisest and most effective action I could take had little to do with voicing my anger, disdain or disappointment. Instead it had everything to do with living and responding in a way that is true to the person I aspire to be. In a way that is true to the values of love, kindness, compassion, generosity, acceptance, and equanimity I aspire to embody.
Living and responding in ways—especially to those whose perspectives and behaviours I might find confronting, ill-informed, or downright mean spirited—that uplift, reinforce, and increase our connectedness with each other and the one global community of which we’re all a part.
And that might just be the least technical, but most personally relevant, way that I’ve found so far, for answering: How does mindfulness work and why is it so important?